hey everyone, just thought i would start a post for a chat.

i am feeling really invisible lately and people seem to have such an attitude with me. i just feel like i am kind and caring and considerate to others (unless they upset me) but they just dont see me. they want me to be someone else that im not,, and i wont change for anyone so they abandon me. i went to work today feling really low and just wanted someone to be there for me, and what was waiting... insults. people just seemed to be picking out the bad points to my character, i mean, im not perfect i know but i dont need reminding of my bad points every single day. i cannot remember the last time i recieved a compliment, i can name so many insults but no compliments. am i really that bad a person? i always knew i had problems etc (who doesnt, we are human afterall!) but thats all i seem to see now becuase i have nobody to remind me of any positive points i have, if any.

people just dont want to get to know me, all they want to do is judge and critisize me. i wouldnt mind so much if i was critisized by people who know me but nobody does want to know me, all they want to do is change me. which will never happen.

when i feel this way i try to think of how i would comfort someone else if they were going thorugh this, and not me. i find answers but they dont seem to help. so how can i try to help others and not be able to help myself.

i feel like i cant sing either, and that was the last thing i wanted to be effected. i hold so much protection for my passion of music but it feels affected recently and i cried the other night about loads of things, one of them being the fact i feel i cant sing and thats what i want to do as a career. i just feel so worthless!!

some of the things people say to me in work is awful, and most of them i let go over my head but when everyone constantly treats me that way i have to believe that is how i am. dont get me wrong, i certainly stand up for myself, but then they accuse me of being grumpy and snappy and ignore me then. i cant win. im sick and tired of being invisible and i want someone to just see me for me and appreciate me for it. doubt it will happen though!

thanks for listening. if you feel the same feel free to post it on here.

speak soon