What a burdon for us EDs have. To constantly worry. I work with young children and sometimes watch how they eat. I try to think back when I didn't care what i ate or how many calories there was in my apple juice, or how many miles i have to run to burn off the yogurt i just ate. It was a long time ago but i remember. I ate when i was hungery. I remember going to my Nona's house with my family. She would feed us from the moment we got there to the moment we left. My brothers and I would lie around lazy after our tummies got too full. And not once did I think "will I gain weight?". I try to remember when I started denying myself certain foods. I'm sure it was some time in highschool. I was always athletic and never "fat" , i was solid but not skinny, skinny. But why be skinny? Be healthy. Eat what you want, over eat if you desire. But don't punish yourself for it. I wish i wasn't such a hypacrit but it's good advice that i've gotten non the less. Keep on trying.