My boyfriend and I have been together for quite a while, though we live an hour apart. I'll be honest and say that I enjoy having my personal space, while he wishes that we could be together more often.

The thing is, I feel like he doesn't respect me in regard to that personal space. When I get home from certain things that I go to alone, I feel like I need a bit of time to myself when I get back to my house to just relax and decompress. Not a long time or anything, just like 10 minutes to cool down, you know? I told him this before. Yet, when he wants to come over, and I tell him what time works for me, he always comes a lot earlier than I tell him to.

For example, if I was working until 6:30pm, and got home at around 7, I'd tell him to come for 7:30. Instead of actually listening to me, I'd get home at 7:15 and he'd be parked in front of my house waiting for me. This happened yesterday. I was really upset, because a. I wanted some time to myself to just cool down, and b. I told him to come later in the day. He even said that he'd been sitting in his car for half an hour. He could've went inside, my parents were home, but no, he sat in his car for 30 minutes!

He was really angry at me because I was slightly irritated over wanting a few minutes to myself. He mockingly whined about how incredibly stressful my life must be, and then today he sent me a few strings of nasty messages over not calling him back, calling me a selfish c*** (I went for a walk to pick up a movie and was then watching the movie with my parents, had my phone on silent, but I called him back once it was over). He didn't have anything important to say, and just talked for a few minutes about some movie he was watching as well. It wasn't an emergency, nothing worth getting upset over.

I feel like I have to justify myself to him (just noticed that I'm even doing it here), and I also feel like he just can't deal with me wanting a bit of space. We've been talking a lot about breaking up, as well him rattling off lists of a few things I do that really irritate him.

I'm not sure what I'm looking for, I just wanted to vent. He's been my best friend for almost 5 years, and it's terrible to see that kind of animosity gradually grow between people. I think he feels lonely a lot, and sometimes I think my desire to have some space to myself might feel like rejection to him. At the same time, him retaliating against my desire for personal space doesn't exactly make me want to genuinely spend more time with him.