Damn. And I thought I had a screwed up family. Your family seems excessively negative, insecure, and cruel. My advice is to stay as far away from them as possible at all times. You can't fix them, that's for sure. And you will never be able to change their minds about you. After all, why should they? This system works for them just fine. Dump them and get out there and find your own family members in friendships. When you find normal people, they will reflect back to you what is true about you. Then you will see that you are normal, too.