Hey, thank you very much for replying... I know it's kind of silly thanking everyone every time they reply me...but I'm finding my self pretty lost here and can't really talk to anyone.
I'm even afraid of telling anybody. In my old town, since I started developping my several...problems... when I was still a kid basically I tended to believe there were some people I could tallk about but they all ended up calling me a freak, a schizo, telling me I scare the living **** out of them and that I had to keep far from them ^^'''
Here people don't know about anything. Weirdly enough I've been pretty good hiding also my BPD. I don't want to mess things.
Somehow I also managed to persuade my parents I could live on my own. And I'm not sure that living with someone could help. I am not very good at dealing with people 24/7. And I don't want to make them suffer...they already have their problems and I have already ****ed this family up enough. Can't deal with that responsability anymore.

This might sound silly but...what's a T?
I'm not seing any doctors at the moment.
Changed 8 in 5 years...have been followed even by more at the same time.
I'm not sure whether it's me or them who gives up first.

Thank you again, anyway.
I guess I should hug you back now