since june I havent been myself. my therapist left in june and since then been feeling disconnected most days and dissociation comes so easily. I dont care to fix it. Its been six months and I have no fill in therapist and sometimes I get to the point that I dont want one cause I am done with therapy all togehter. to include medications and IOP. Most of the time i am in complete conflict with myself about everything and honestly dont want to deal with it. I hate my situation hate myself hate is the only feeling i tend to have. besides images of self harm. I often wonder if therapy is worth it, I know that it will bring up urges to self harm and drink and such but i dont want to engage in that atleast I dont think so. not sure why I am writing this anyways I dont want to have a therapist that I start to like they will just leave me too. i dont want to burn them out or make them tell me I havent changed.