I am sorry you are stuck in such a hard place. I agree about the ebb and flow of life. You have been in a place before where you were on top of your game and you were respected. That will happen again. For now you are where you are, and you need to be doing this: to be healing. Other things have to go on the back burner. Once this healing is all done and dusted you will once again be able to focus and function and get on with the real business of living.
But it IS a worry that right now, while you are (were) in the process of doing what you needed to do to heal, your T work has become so unpredictable and inconsistently available. I get that you want *her* and that a substitute doesn't work. But how impossibly hard must it be to be in this waiting place, this no-mans land... this place where you are smack bang in the middle of your stuff and unable to pack it away to get on with the business of life, yet equally unable to get on with the process of healing? How hard is that?? I can't imagine...
What strategies can you use for self support? Do you have much internal communication or support? Can you guys look out for each other? I hear that you don't have much in the way of external support, but what things can you do to look out and care for your own inside selves? I know that for my own system that it helped to support each other... especially if we could pair up older ones to take care of younger ones etc, almost like in a parental role.
What about externally... could the money you are not currently spending on therapy be used to support yourselves in other ways?