hi jaqc10, i have missed you. am gald to see you are back and ready to beat these feelings.

dont worry about waking up crying, your subconcious needs to do this, go with it and allow yourself to cry.

please dont drink just because you feel you should. if you know alcohol has more bad effects than it has good, dont drink it. you need to be able to look after yourself and if alcohol makes you worse that wont help. it is a well known fact that alcohol contains a depressive chemical, so by drinking it you will naturally feel unhappier.

give the councilling a try. even though it is twice a month it will help you a great deal. and if you started seeing them and they realise how much you are suffering, they may transfer you to another councillor who is more frequent, or they may be able to extend the amount of times you can see them. it is only a basic time scale they give you, i am sure they will allow exceptions.

it is so hard to overcome the emotions you have. to be able to talk out starts you on a good path towards happiness. you have done the right thing by coming back for help.

a new uni is bound to be so hard to get use to. it is entirely new surroundings, new faces and new objectives. you have been removed from your comfort zone and are now in a "foriegn" place, allow yourself a little time to adjust and settle in. it is natural to be scared about something that big in your life. i am positive that once you settle in you will begin feeling better because you will make new friends and have more to do. dont forget, you have just started there, you cant expect to feel great about it so soon.

take care jacq10, and like i said, i am truly glad to see you back. let me know if theres anything you need ok. you dont need to be scared or confused anymore.

simon