...like I even know what to do with it right?

but thats the point!

it's an availability an option an opportunity a potential abundance!

like I care anyway I'm too mentally ill to cope with such extremes beyond the crap ones!

my freaking brain chemistry is my enemy...I want to hurt the world around me when it gets real bad....

my day was over today and now it's 70 more days to wait for that.
i guess there must be lots of other humans in trouble too and I know there are..

I just don't want to be one of them

..one thing for real though?

when it's a threat...like the freedom is gone...

then what you or I imagined was the worst cynical horror...well it gets worse.

I have to abandon hope....

humans do not cope without hope.....depending how intense they be...quickly it cuts out...

anything can happen after that....such a shame....and just because a brain don't work so good!

f*^king crap set up!

nevermind just don't work.....too busy fighting the illness it's incessant but there is always someone worse huh?