I am sorry you are feeling so low and there is something you can do for yourself. That is try to be kind to yourself. Don't be harsh or angry with yourself because of the person you wish you could be. Instead think of the depression as a learning experience. To learn about who you are and what you can do to over come and cope with it. Maybe start a journal and write out your feelings, it won't help right away but over time you will see the benefits. Try to focus on happy memories instead of the bad memories, and try to be positive about the situations you are in. It will take time to be positive, but once you start feeling bad try to turn it around for yourself. It's all going to be ok really! Just hang in there! *hugs*
Pamela Su