Having "alexithymic" on my chart has turned out to be a curse, at least when it comes to my pdoc. It gives him license to tell me how I'm feeling and to attribute every physical symptom to anxiety. And if I dare to argue with him? Well, the very act of showing frustration demonstrates that I'm an "angry woman with issues"...and that I'm indeed riddled with anxieties and other kinds of emotions that I haven't properly dealt with.

But if I don't show any emotion, I'm characterized as having blunt affect.

I can't win.