The thing that hurts me the most about all of this was my parents fully supported my sister and brother's dreams and goals and gave them everything to suceed. Money, college of their choosing, emotional support, validation, participated in all of the events related to their professions, sent them abroad for extern and internships (my brother to Switzerland and my sister to the islands in South America) and with their blessings. But for some reason said flat out "no" to me. And then they went ahead and did all the things and visited the locations where I wanted to go. And sent me postcards and made international calls to let me know they were there and having a great time.

They set my siblings up for success but they set me up for failure. I will never understand it. Not in a million years

And they seem to enjoy that I am so unhappy and low. Esp my adoptive mother....she seems to really love it all. It seems as if she couldnt stand not being the center of the universe. And it is a huge power trip for her.

I hate to say it but it was / is similar to that story where the two horrible, hateful siblings got everything and the one sibling was forced to watch them while she had to sweep the floors and live in the basement.

She never had to work or make anything of herself career-wise. Yet, she couldn't stand to see me enjoying my life and succeeding.

Another sad part was that I believed all the bs she would spout: I could never make it on my own and if I pursued my dreams it was unacceptable, and I would be cut off. It was like brainwashing.

She punished me by with holding. Love, affection, support, validation all of my life. I never did anything wrong. In fact, I was a great kid with good grades and a vision. So many mixed messages and conditions.