Always been dealing with these problems associated with depression..

Cried the other day, watching videos about people who committed suicide. Haven't cried in several years. Imagined myself in that place. Imagined them describing the situation as my "friends" and family.

Don't fit in this world. Have good moments when the life of the party and happy.. But no one really knows me. My close friends don't care. Drink booze with them, smoke weed with them. That's all that matters.

No college education. No job prospects. Bi-polar disorder, Anti Social Personality Disorder, Depression. Broken human.

Why stay? New brain? New life? Or peace..