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Now that you know that you are in your head, and hiding, can you find what is triggering? Maybe thinking through and identifying the triggers will help? Write them down, and bring them to T. Also, since you have the urge to SI and you aren't doing it now, find a way to stop this urge this time, and if it works, do it next time.. So on and so forth.. So, it won't get so bad.
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"You decide every moment of every day who you are and what you believe in. You get a second chance, every second."
"You fail to recognize that it matters not what someone is born, but what they grow to be!" - J.K. Rowling. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire.
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