Willow, I know just what you mean (I think) I get the same way, I start off with people, things go well, first I am shy but then get more comfortable, then when people start asking me to join them either for dinner or go shopping with them I make all excuses that I am not able, so I recline any invites for friendships, it is weird, so I just stay connected with my dog, the "natural" world of wildlife and plants. . . I guess I am just meant to be a "loner"?? Maybe I value my freedom to do what I want and when I want to? I wish there was some answer to why I do this, I sometimes wonder if it is the fear of being hurt over time, like I have been in the past, do you think that is one answer, do you get to feeling this way too?
Sorry, I don't know if you wanted to talk about this, but your post just seemed to sort of hit on the way I feel often.
Take care of yourself,
** hugs **
"darkeyes"