Sometimes our meds don't work the way they should any longer and an adjustment is necessary when we find ourselves in crisis. You sound like you're in crisis. Get help now. Hospitalization is scary, but it really does help. They will be able to help you get the rest, nutrition and care you need while your world slows back down. Get help before mania becomes depression. Besides, there is actually more to fear from out of control mania and extreme lack of sleep than the hospital. Think about it. I will keep you in my prayers.