Snowbird, First welcome!! What you said really struck me about your mother not allowing you to intrude on life. It reallys says so much to me. All this time, I been given examples of who does a good job but no matter what I'm doing it isn't the correct way; there is ALWAYS a better way. From peeling an apple to rotating tires on a car or even the way I kept my purse as a teenager, my father always pointed out what was wrong. I'm terrified to give my own opinion and at times wonder if I even have one. I just want to do what is agreable to everyone around me; don't make waves and just try to pleasing and accomodating.

so, the depersonalization makes sense to me. I am not a person, everyone else is but I will never match up too or fit in with the normal people.

(at least that is what my brain was trained to think)