Exactly! Nobody seems to understand our fear of sex. What virgins there are seem to want to have it, not fear it like we do, and I know that if the time ever comes for me, I will be hysterical. I am nauseous even thinking about it. It’s not a ‘it’s new and unknown’ fear for me, as I think it far exceeds that, it most likely has to do with having a history of sexual abuse and a (what I am told to be) distorted view of relationships and sex. I’ll cry if I talk about sexual subjects too much. I won’t watch movies with sex in them or graphic images. Just watch me totally freeze up and have a panic attack.

Oral sex for me would also be problematic because I fear contamination and germs, or it can cause me a significant amount of anxiety. I don’t like kisses let alone oral sex. Nobody's mouth will ever come near me.