After all the abuse I have we have Indore has made me feel insecure not feels like scars that will not go away not sure how to deal with my mixed feelings now that everything is well seems to be back to normal, my marriage seems to be good, {seems} but is it I really haven't a clue, I keep distance like I have walls up to hide my feelings,wondering if the bad hurt feelings will go away, I thought time would help but it hasn't every time I look into her eyes I feel the pain all over again wondering how she could put me through all that, but I hide my feelings so she doesn't know how I really feel, anyone have any after abuse recovery that really would work.I been reading many things but nothing seems to help. I have recently met someone that does make me feel good about myself is that bad? Not an affair just fulfillment and complete like I was before all the bs with my hole family started.I know my wife wouldn't approve but I am sick of being hurt and worried about if I did something wrong or is she going to turn against me again and make me leave,my drinking is in check haven't had any whiskey at all.