(hug)

i have the exact same feelings about knowing i married for dependability and security over all, overlooking major red flags. now am dealing with the consequences. i too feel guilty when i admit that i did so and also feel like i ruined his life.

at the same time, i just want out. but my guilt keeps me from leaving. we are older and have no kids. it doesn't just happen to those in their 20s. i think part of my issue honestly was feeling like i had to get married, i was in my 30s and thought if i didn't marry soon and have kids i would miss the train. how misguided was i. now i'm in a loveless marriage with no desire to have children with this person. oh well, you live and learn.

<3