Hang in there. You are going thru a lot right now .. its gonna take time.
Believe me it will get better .. I had to put my dog down in Aug and was devastated but, time does heal us.
Oh the holidays suck for sure .. I hate them too and cringe at the thoughts of being around anyone at this time of year.
I didnt think I would ever get over the loss of my beloved critter but I am and have found a new pup. This one will never replace my Barney but, it will help me cope better.
I hope you find peace soon.