You should seek out help. Life is so worth living. Depression is not living it's existing. I've been there and I know. Now that I take meds I hate the time I let depression have just because I procrastinated. I honestly thought I could do it alone. I took and still take meds. I would not change that for the world. It gave me my life back and most importantly it gave me myself back. The meds did put a hamper on my sex drive. But I would take no sex drive anyday over the depression and the hindsight of what it took from me.