Quote:
Originally Posted by Valentinedemorcerf
Also, for people whose first time is a do-it-in-the-dark-with-a-stranger sort of affair, though it's unethical and emotionally scarring especially for females, at least they don't have to look that person in the eyes for the every day for rest of their life if it's a horrible experience. And the marriage thing adds pressure because of the expectations. But that's something I'm willing to work through for the other rewards of waiting.
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Two points here: The first is you cannot and shouldn't make judgements on other's experiences. You were not there, you do not know what happened, or how they feel.
The second is that I think you have a slightly skewered view on sex. Being married doesn't mean that there is more pressure, why should it? Everyone has a first time, being married makes no difference. You are building this up out of all proportion. There's been sound advice here and I really think you should let go of all of your previous views on sex, and relax. Sex, or making love can be a wonderful act. Sure, the first time, or even first few times can be strange, but then it would be wouldnt it? We ALL learn as we go along, like everything in life. I know one thing for sure, if you dont relax, it may be physically uncomfortable for penetration. Just listen to your partner, talk to your partner, go with your feelings and relax, relax relax!!!