There is a balance need in a r/s. Totally true, that one partner cannot solely the taker while the other the giver.

Not trying to stir the pot here anymore than it appears to be churning, but unless I misinterpreted here, correct me if so, I really think Hamster is just trying to point out that refraining from sex from her partner and expecting him to be completely faithful IS more give than take.

I am currently in a relationship where sex is being withheld for a long time, as far as Maslow's concerned, only meets the first two needs. Our intimacy has been shattered and us obtaining a higher lever of happiness is impossible.

That being said, it most certainly is not entirely LadyZero's 'fault'. There really isn't fault here, just can't think of a better substitute word. Anyway, Counseling would most certainly be recommended for healing in this r/s. If he considered an affair, chose not to, then quickly admitted it without being confronted...I don't mean to be rude but I think he is trying to hold up his end of the bargain, but there could be a lot of underlying issues idk about.

Trying to untangle the ruffle here, not exacerbate it, I promise. It makes me anxious to see conflict and tension build on these threads. It's very okay to have different opinions, that's why we ask questions here, to get exactly that. But posts on PC really shouldn't be directed at attacking those views different than yours, but rather just simply sharing your own views.

Maybe this is why ppl are so hesitant to respond these days....???