What I think is at issue here is not the level of interest or disinterest, but rather your perception of it.

I think this is what Anne is referring to as owning your discomfort.

People sit the way they sit, and may do so for any number of reasons. Interest may not even be one of them.

So, while all of us absolutely have a right to a therapist who is interested and engaged with us, I do have to wonder if analyzing the way someone sits is the best way to gauge that engagement.

OR, in the case of the male therapist, gauge the degree of sexual presence.

I may become uncomfortable around a male who is sitting with his legs open, but does that mean he's a sexual predator? Absolutely not! The problem is mine. I attribute that to him, based on my perception.

My perception, in turn, is based on my history and the baggage I'm bringing to the moment.

Checking our perceptions, challenging our beliefs, learning a new and better way are all good reasons to be in therapy and I think we all have a tendency to try to bend therapy to our old system of thinking.

I think most have a tendency to go on the defensive when challenged.

In the end though, it's usually all good, and all fodder for change.