Quote:
Originally Posted by Miswimmy1
when we cut ourselves off, its easier because we feel safer, less vulnerable. we sort of numb ourselves to the pain of being close to someone and the unpredictability of it..
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Yes, totally. I agree that it's easier - safer - 'in the moment' to be cut off and numb, less vulnerable - it's easier to speak, for a start... but I find for me it's ultimately distressing. I crave the closeness with T, the maternal warmth. If I'm 'comfortably numb' in session, usually I drive home feeling empty and alone, and by the time I'm curled up in bed for the evening I'm a mess, wanting a do-over.