I've been suffering the holiday blues since 1991 or so. When my grandmother died. She was the glue that held my grossly unhealthy family together. Up until her death, we spent every single birthday and holiday together ~ the entire family. So, it was that way for the first 21 years of my life. It was what I knew.

The family very quickly fell apart after my grandma died. I still had my grandpa ~ but he was always very emotionally abusive! The b.s. continued within my sick family. When my own small family (now ex) hub, and 2 young daughters moved across the country, we thought that we could just jump into hub's family traditions. It wasn't that easy.

Now that we're divorced, and split custody of our girls 50/50, life just sucks. It's all very depressing to me! I'd rather treat every day as though they're all the same. I'm not religious anyway & memories of past holidays only depress me further.