Thanks for sharing all this Lydia! I didn't realize this was the situation you were dealing with. It sounds so awful!
I don't know much about DID at all, but common sense would say that of course you would need a DID specialist, you have Did! I was trying to look for a therapist for someone else with DID on here, and a therapist I contacted said,"You'll find a lot of therapists who can treat DID, because it's an extreme form of PTSD and a lot of therapists treat that." Again, I don't know much about this, but even I didn't believe her!
I don't know what to tell you. It's so sad to me that these so called "professionals" are doing so much harm, and would rather blame you than take responsibility for their actions. I really hope things get better soon. Is there any way you can try and research a DID specialist without these useless hurtful people? Clearly you need a compitent therapist skilled in this area, who can help you work with the part that's so destructive but knows no other way. Also, are you connected with any others on here that have DID? I know there are some. They might have more insights than I would, because I'm coming from a place of empathy, yet have never experienced the disorder and they have.
I hope this helps. I wish I could say more. Keep us posted. And try to keep yourself as safe as possible.