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After writing this, I feel a huge sense of relief and a sense of accomplishment. To me, this means I am healing, and I did this myself. This is my story, this is my truth. I  myself at the moment.
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this is so wonderful anti ... and that you've done it yourself is really inspiring. There is so much growth in your words and in your discoveries.
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Now, what is the crime that an analyst and the patient's "healthy" self have committed?
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I keep coming back to this part about the crime committed; it's a hard one to avoid when at that moment in time it seems like there are only two involved in the conversation and yet really it's more than that. The word crime feels harsh and yet to the part that shows up later it's reality. Like the needy Anti you mentioned who in no way agreed to termination and yet has to now deal with it on her own
Glad you are processing all of this ... it's helping me understand some things better as well.