T,
I feel so alone right now. I think I have made alot of progress this week. Thank you for sitting with me.and my shame. It was so uncomfortable. I am afraid to go to work tomorrow because anything I am told to do goes in one ear and out the other. It is so scary not to be able to focus or remember. This is so humiliating. My brain hurts. I wish I could find a job and work from home. How will I make it? I have to work and make money but fearing what I have been failing at so long is detrimental. I don't have a life because I know I have to go back where I can't keep up and everyone knows it. I feel like such a loser, incompetent, anx dependent. I don't belong. I am so anxious. If I can't figure out what other jobs I can do that wouldn't require me to be around alot of people, it is going to drive me into the ground. Please, please help me with this. I can't continue to go on trying to work with and understand people when I don't. I have one job that I would have to take a few classes for, and it would take me until next year to finish. I don't know. I am ashamed of who I have become. I want to be helpful and productive instead of self focused. I want to get better. Thanks for helping me. I still love myself, I just feel afraid and frustrated so I can't feel it. I need to remember to ask you about self states. Over and out