Quote:
Originally Posted by Detia
I don't really know. I did not have the best childhood but I had a very good one that I have very fond memories of. I know that I've had an aggressive pattern of self abuse since I was a child. Something that I've talked to my parents about and they said they didn't understand why I behaved the way I did when I threw fits. I always blamed myself, and I often still do. I hear that such an act as si is that there is anger placed towards oneself, or frustration or blame.
I have gotten here partly because of my choices, but also because I haven't really known how to reach out when something was wrong. It is sometimes very hard to recognize what is wrong. Even now that I'm more better equipped to deal with myself, I don't always know HOW to ask for help or support. It is a very large road-block that sets me back time and again.
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When I question my life the choices I have made I guess to have brought me here.
It's what made me think these choices were the right ones and to mess them up so badly.
My moods and self loathing is gettin on my own nerves and although I have had only one session of therepy and still waiting on diagnoses.
I want to start helping myself
I'm going to find some books that may help.
If anyone has any suggestions I would be very grateful