Hey guys and gals,

Just wanting a spot of advice regarding anxiety. I've been feeling anxious for ages, mainly in the context of depression and mixed episodes. Anyway, now the mood thing is somewhat sorted but the anxiety lives on.

I half told my psychiatrist about it but he asked if it stopped me doing stuff and I said no even though the answer was yes.

An example is this weekend.

So my housemate was away, so on Friday I just didn't get out of bed til 6pm because I don't really have many friends here (just moved this year) and the thought of dealing with a whole day seemed pointless so I just slept through it.

Then yesterday I had heaps of jobs to do, and saw a few friends. I get anxious when I go to the shops but I just breathe through it because I know the whole cbt thing blah blah. I get really anxious at home. Little jobs like tidying my room stress me out to the point of my heart pounding and feeling sick, but i usually force myself to do them eventually. Then today I just felt sick all day. The good thing about it is that's dont eat as much so my drug belly doesn't grow. But doing anything, like walking outside or public transport or making food or basically doing anything other than nothing is really stressful and makes me feel really anxious.

I know the whole cbt thing and I'm not a stressor or a worrier at all, it's just this gut anxiety all the time. Except less at work, where I'm mainly ok now.

I mean I guess one big scale I feel stressed as life isn't exactly going to plan right now, but I don't see what's could do differently to stop it, except regain my self esteem which well and truly died in the last giant mixed episode where I just became captain self destructive.

What should I do? Should I tell my psychiatrist? I. Don't have an appointment with him til next year, but I could make one. I'm scared of getting too dependent on drugs, but if this is something that could be fixed like the epic bipolar depression was with the right amount of drugs should I just go see him?

Oh wow, this got really long.