I feel really abandoned, small and forgotten right now. And I know it's not your fault. Which only makes me feel worse. Cause I'm like the never ending pit that needs more attention, time, and energy than anyone can ever give. I'm trying. I really want you to know that. But I don't know how much longer I can keep holding on. I really needed to talk to you today. You cancelled last minute. I know you rescheduled for tomorrow.. but that doesn't help. Its just making me feel worse. I wish you would just let me die.