Going through some of the same issues. Been married 7 years I have never fully trusted my husband. This is my second marriage. I love my husband my jealousy drove me into acting in ways that eventually put a wedge between us. While we are still together my life is worse now. He goes places without me, doesn't seem to enjoy my company even at homemade I no longer feel loved and wanted. I know I messed up. If he is with you then he is with you. Enjoy that so you wont lose everything.