but quietcat... maybe the stories are sad if they repeat, but recognizing the pattern is a big achievement, not something to be deliberately dodged - is it? and if someone withholds the second, third, xth incident from T in hope that there won't be a pattern recognized - is that person making good use of therapy? I have to wonder.

having said all that, YES telling one incident may be hard, for shame; telling the next can be AS hard but maybe partly because the shame is for a different reason; and telling the third, and the xth, can be even harder. again not for the same reason as the first.
but if it helps us to clear away the debris so we can see to get up and walk straight - ah, isn't that worth a lot?