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Old Dec 07, 2012, 01:11 PM
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madisgram madisgram is offline
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Member Since: Nov 2008
Location: Sunny East Coast Florida!
Posts: 6,873
heni, i hope your diab. son is better today. i have diab. too and it takes a lot to stay on course. thinking of you.
as for your mom i'd tell her her drinking can be a trigger for you to drink. i'd set a clear boundary with her or suggest she find another place to live. our sobriety must come first above all things they teach us including family. i balked at that but later understood what it meant. i had a functional alcoholic husband and when i decided to drink his beer was my source even tho i hated beer.
it sounds like about everyone is leaning on you. it's incredible. putting out everyone's fires will wear you down mentaly, emotionally and physically. there's a saying in AA-don't know if you go-it's called H.A.L.T. hungry, angry, lonely and tired. any or all of these components can lead us to a drink.
when i read all of your post i thought of erma bombeck's life. as an after thought your day was "amusing" just as she described her life. (you have BTW a gift of writing). but also overwhelming. you did a great job however to see the hysteria thru.
don't know how long you've been sober but you definitely need people and sometimes children to take some responsibillty of their own.
hope today is less hectic.
__________________
Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle.
The world you desired can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours..~Ayn Rand
Thanks for this!
roads