Debbie, you know what Dr. Phil would tell you, right? "Is what you are doing working for you?" Obviously, it's not.

You and I are in the same boat as far as those men in are life are concerned. I get the same answers you get; "I don't know" or "It happens before I realize it."

Like Jax said, if he hasn't changed in 30 yrs, he's not goin to. What you need to change is how you react to it. That's the point. Don't REact. When he does these things, STOP, realize that it's NOT about you, but about HIM, and then decide what you're going to do differently from what you've been doing all these years. You can ignore him, but don't stuff the feeling. Let it go. Or... you can snap him between the eyes with a rubber band! LOLOL No, just kidding! OR!! Ship his butt out! That's what I did!

Good luck, Hon.