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Anonymous37913
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Default Dec 07, 2012 at 05:48 PM
 
Based on my own life experiences, I agree totally with the findings put forth in both parts of your post.

I suffer from social isolation and depression. I am really disliked in the community despite the volunteer work I have done. I am not good at building coalitions with others. So, when I put in my two cents, even if they have been requested, I am viewed as an outsider and a problem. They can't wait to get rid of me and I have been banished for standing up against inappropriate behavior of others. My social anxiety has gotten so bad that now, at times, I am unable to speak back when people say rude things directly to my face. I just freeze like an animal with an approaching car's headlights in their eyes. I walk around somber most of the time and that further turns off others and makes me an outcast. However, it prevents others from interacting with me and, from an unconscious standpoint, it protects someone like me with a history of poor social results.

As a sufferer of C-PTSD, I have asked myself hundreds of times - Why is my mind doing this to me? A lot of my problems were the instinctive ways that I responded to things; problems that CBT could not help because I was responding instinctively. I guess my C-PTSD thoughts are meant to release endorphins. However, the effects are not helpful; they are just inappropriate and, ultimately, hurtful. I do not know how to control my instinctive responses. It does not help to ignore them or to just let them pass - they just keep on coming back.
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Thanks for this!
gabmux