Quote:
Originally Posted by suicidesickness94
I'm new; But I'm 18 & live with family. Some of you might say my username has to do with why I'm on this site, but you are wrong.
You all have the same issues as me and others on other illnesses.
Here's my story:
I have mild depression, and self injure for 2 years now.
Yesterday, I felt down with no one to really talk to.
I've had people notice when I cut, I'm not ashamed, but sometimes I have regretted hurting my own self.
I know that once a person injures themselves, they have scars for the rest of forever...
I'm making this post just to get some insigh, and maybe help myself & others (:
But I know I need to stop, and try to find reasons to be happy..
I just wanted to know how many of you, have been dealing with different issues to make you struggle with self injury? How many times a day or month or whatever do you tend to do it? What are some reasons or excuses you tell people when or if they notice? How many years have you done it for? Do you rely on yourself to quit if you want to stop, or do you think finding someone you care for/they care for you make you wantto quit?
It'd be great to talk to any of you, or get some insight.
-SuicideSickness <3
|
Hi. I'm glad you don't feel ashamed when you do SI. That lightens the load a bit. You are right, you do need to stop, not for anyone else, but for yourself.
Even though you only feel "a little depressed", there is obvously something bothering you, perhaps on a deeper level. Cutting is kind of a radical thing to do for a mild problem.
The thing about cutting is that is tends to get worse over time. At first, its sort of experimental, but seems to relieve your emotional discomfort for a while, but that wears off. Pretty soon, it takes more radical cuts to make you feel better. Even the small cuts can get infected, and if you make a mistake, you could wind up cutting a vessel or tendon.
When I started, some three decades plus ago, I didn't think it was a big deal. I was wrong though. It became a big deal as the SI got worse and the attacks more vicious. I went from burning an arm with heated nail heads to cutting through skin, fat and muscle all in one stroke of the knife. I could have bled out or had a clot break free and cause death. Usually, the incidents would occur when the stress got too bad and or I felt trapped. I finally stopped after decades of self inflicted wounds by promising a good friend I wouldn't do it again. That may not work for everyone, but it did me.
What ever the reason, you need to find out why you are cutting so you can stop it before it gets bad. Cutters aren't trying to commit suicide, but they are trying to stop emotional pain. As far as scars go, its hard to keep track of all the excuses after a while. Most people cut areas that won't be seen most of the time. You don't want be covered with scars though. They will stay with you for life. Whether its coming here or going to a professional, you need to get help so that you can stop.
Sam2