I guess I could preface what I say with, "I'm afraid I'm making a mountain out of a molehill, but I think I need to get this off of my chest."

Or I could just ask her if I'm making a mountain out of a molehill.

I think she will probably point out that I'm being assertive or expressive and not take what I say personally. So instead of swallowing the let-down, I will try to reveal it somehow. But I'm going to try to not be emotional about it. If I can keep calm and cool, then I will feel like I'm still being strong.