Hi all.

This is really a two-part post.

First of all, I am a new member here. I know that there IS a thread to introduce yourself, but I figured I'd just do it with my first post.

My name is Melissa, and I live in Ohio. Bipolar disorder is just one of my diagnosis, but it is the one that I am choosing to deal with the most right now.

Anyways (on to the second part of my post) I have a new psych doctor. (Really, she is a nurse practitioner.) The old one quit or something.

I'm really grateful for any help I can get. (I'm disabled, and I know what it's like to not be under any type of care. Really, Ohio is great for having all these programs and resources for people with any type of disability.) But this doctor is going to kill me one of these days.

Maybe I got too used to life being my version of "normal". My meds all seemed to be working right for me, and I had finally gotten my sugar under control, even with being on Seroquel. However, my new doc "L" believes in minimalist medications. So, she took me off of Seroquel, and put me on some other new medication.

I was on the new medication for about a week, and I got VERY SICK. (Physically, not mentally) The worst was that my digestive system just STOPPED moving.

I called the Dr's office and let L know that I had to stop taking the medication. I wasn't allowed to talk to her, so I just had to leave a message, but no call came about what to do. Meanwhile I kept weening myself off of the Seroquel.

So, last week I went crazy. I got into horrible sobbing argument with my sister (she was right!). I started to get horrible urges to hurt myself and other people. WOW!

Finally, last Tuesday, I saw L, again. I asked her to hospitalize me, because the urges were so bad. Instead, she changed my meds again, and told me to try to get through it!!!

I started the new meds on Tuesday. On Thursday, I lost it again. I wanted to go to the ER to try to be put in-patient until the meds evened out. Mom and my husband over-ruled me, though.

So, here I am, still muddling through. The thoughts have died down a LOT, but I'm still not RIGHT, if you know what I mean.