Quote:
Originally Posted by hamster-bamster
Oh, I am so sad... My old old French lover, Charles, hinted at ED. He mentioned not wanting to disappoint me, mentioned diabetes, and finally mentioned "it does not matter if I can or I cannot, I just want to see you and reconnect with you". I last saw him in the 1990s. He did not have ANY problems of that sort back then. In fact he could pull off two sex acts in a row easily. I am pretty sure he has ED - why else would he mention diabetes, it is not as it I were asking for his chart. I know, diabetes is notorious for this complication.
At first, I was shocked. After receiving countless spam emails about Viagra, I could not understand why he would even mention that! Can't he just take a pill and function?!?!
After the initial shock wore off, I did a search for diabetes and ED and discovered that pills are not 100% effective. So that must be it - he is unsure that pills would help him. That is why the talk about disappointment.
I also read that besides the pill, "stimulation" is needed - I take it, touching the penis. That REALLY disappointed me. I never had to touch his penis before - the mere fact of my existence always was stimulating enough for him, and I liked it this way. But I guess in order to be nice I can provide stimulation... Oh well, the brave new world.
What else do people do in such circumstances? Diabetes is common enough, so I hope that some people would be in the know.
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So he was great. Two sex acts in a 24 hour period without any stimulation and, according to him, without drugs. I was completely unorgasmic, completely unexcited, completely asexual, probably because I am way too stressed out by my divorce and visitation battle with ex husband. So he was very disappointed to the point of feeling that having sex with me now is like taking advantage of me. I tried, unsuccessfully, to convince him that I still enjoy, that sex is not egotistic to me, that I feel joy when he comes (it is clear when he comes, so no complaints there, and he is big, so no complaints from me in that department either) and I feel joy from closeness. Nope, he kept remembering how orgasmic I used to be.
He reports blood sugar level of about 150 on Metformin and 300 before Metformin. My blood sugar level is 71 - almost too low. But he functions well at almost age 70 and I do not function at all at my 42.
At this point I have lost hope that orgasms will ever come back.
So it is me with ED, not him.