I know this thread is a little old, but I'm with Maven. My first time hurt. A lot. And it still hurts a few years after the fact. And my husband is always gentle and loving, and always putting me first. Also, the first time we did it.. I bled. A lot. So much that my mother (Whom I told a little while later) told me to talk to a doctor because she thought it was odd how much I bled. Honestly, I look back on it and laugh about how much I bled, and how I had to wash my sheets in the middle of the night in college... And how worried my husband (just a boyfriend at the time) was about me.... How he sat up with me and helped me with the laundry...

Also... Make sure you go to the bathroom after you have sex EVERY TIME. You will regret it the one time you don't....

But I also agree with Eskie... I waited until I was sure I would be ready for any consequence of having sex... If I didn't feel ready to make a decision for if I got pregnant (meaning, none of that "It won't happen to me" thinking), then I kept waiting. Granted, you also have to keep in mind you're not the only one in this situation.. He has to be ready too... Both in regards to the relationship and what happens if there's a pregnancy... And I think the guy side of this tends to get overlooked a lot....