I fvcked up and I hope to be forgiven. I been at this job for a year now and by all accounts, I made great strides since I first started. Especially since a couple weeks ago when I really kicked it up a notch and watched everything I said and did. I mean everything, to the point of causing anxiety if I fall short of perfect. A few days ago, I slipped. She approached me on the sales floor and I forgot what she said exactly. Then I went, I love you. A second later, realizing my mistake, I immediately went, " sorry I prolly shouldn't have said that."

She went, " no ur fine. U just need to stop watching [some MTV shyt.]"

Now I'm worried like fvck. I return to work tomorrow and then this coming weekend. Wtf is gonna be the outcome? I embarrassed myself and possibly her, even though she didn't get mad or anything. Bc of anxiety, I cut myself and think suicidal thoughts at home. I slipped like that the day after she said I improved. Should I die?