((Granite))

I know that when you're completely swept up and spiralling in negative thoughts and emotions it's just not a possibility to even consider stepping back and looking at the situation rationally, but I really feel that your T doesn't hate you. I truly believe it's your perception being clouded by fear, past events, trauma, etc. I can tell you now that if my T hated me, she wouldn't work with me. She couldn't work with me. She certainly wouldn't invite me to keep coming back for weekly sessions like your T does.

I'm truly sorry you feel so awful about it though, I really am. That 'place' is so familiar to me, and I wouldn't wish it on anyone to be there. Please take care of yourself as best as you can, Granite. I'll be thinking of you during session. I do think you should go - avoidance is rarely ever a good answer (speaking from experience). If you need pocket riders, I'll be with you all the way supporting you, promise! *hand on heart*