I wouldn't e-mail him anything about it and ask him to read it -- it's only going to make him mad, and distance him even further from you. He'll just resent it, and resent you too for "diagnosing" him.

The only way he's going to change is getting help. Maybe in one of his moments' of clarity he'll realize that he's hurting others as well as himself. I'm sorry your marriage failed, but when one partner is emotionally unavailable, and won't seek help, that often happens.

Just be careful when seeking another partner that you don't end up with the same thing -- often we are attracted to the same kinds of men as we had before, so watch very carefully that you don't fall into the same patterns.

Best of luck and I wish you the very best. God bless and please take care. Hugs, Lee