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Dec 12, 2012, 08:32 PM
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Member Since: Dec 2012
Location: California
Posts: 2,248
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nightsky
ETA: I don't even know if it would help if he would change his mind and move it at this point. What I needed was to be heard and seen and cared for. I needed him to SHOW ME that I can use my voice and that my feelings matter. He showed me the opposite. At least that's what it feels like. |
I am moved by what you say and ache for you. I hear so clearly your issue being being seen, and not invisible, and here you spoke up and he didn't really hear you either. It was the opposite - invisible again. My chest feels tight and closed as I think about sitting in my chair in my therapist's office, with an immensely triggering thing in my eyesight, knowing that my therapist isn't responsive in any way..
Not moving it wouldn't necessarily be a power struggle. but refusing to tell you why, or even telling you that he can't tell you why, feels like a power struggle. I feel myself in that situation slinking down into the chair and waiting for him to tell me what I should do next, since obviously my ideas don't count so much. This would be a red flag to me - although I'm not suggesting that all red flags mean to terminate, or even do something drastic. I probably wouldn't make it an ultimatum either. I don't like ultimatums. But I don't think I would let it drop until I had a resolution that I understand and didn't just to have to shut up and adjust. Or I might, because I can be a wimp - but I suspect therapy would go downhill.
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