I feel like everyday is exactly the same. I get cut off, tail-gated, flipped off, and blocked out on my way to work everyday. When I get to work it's the same monotonous routine every day. This specific 'rut' started about six years ago when I found out my girlfriend of 4 years was sleeping with her ex-boyfriend, who happened to work with me. I got really depressed and began drinking and drug use. This caused me to either lose my friends or burn bridges in black-out drunken stupors.

I spent some time in and out of jail, with the longest stretch being two weeks. That was six years ago, today I don't have a single person to hang out with. I have no one to talk to; my roommate and I work opposite schedules. Other than my roommate and my coworkers, I don't have any measurable amount of human interaction, unless you count answering "credit or debit, paper or plastic".

I generally keep to myself, I very much dislike spending time in crowds. I opt out of work Christmas parties and social gatherings. There have been a few things which trigger, what I'm assuming to be depression, (as stupid as this sounds) no one but my parents and brother remember my birthday. I've spent the last two birthdays at home, alone.

Another time I went to see a movie and ran into some people I used to be friends with. I waved and said Hi as they passed, they looked me dead in the eyes without saying a word.

Sometimes I experience periods of contempt and spite. On Monday the general incompetence and apathy of the part-timers. Today, I was belittled and embarrassed by my boss and her sycophants for attempting to contribute to conversation in the lunch room.

As I sit here and type out the last six years of my life I realize I might just need someone to talk to. Feel free to give your input, professional or not.