I realize that if your wife won't communicate, and tell you what she needs and wants, things are pretty difficult. Will she talk at ALL? Will she tell you what she needs from you or wants from you? There must be somethings she needs or she wouldn't be crying. She wouldn't be so miserable.

Like Eskielover said, this other woman is WRONG. Talking to her is just clouding your thinking -- she's taking AWAY from your wife. What you're saying to this woman, should be going to your wife!! Even if your wife doesn't seem to be listening, she'll get some of it, believe me. And you have to give your wife an opportunity to talk to YOU -- to say things to you that she's been holding in for years. You have to LISTEN to her, and let her be heard. I hope she will DO it. Make sure she knows she CAN do this.

Things are really screwed up now, and I wish you two were still in counseling because you definitely are not through with it! You need more. Ask your counselor if you can continue with more -- and ask your wife if she'll go back with you. It's really imperative that you two either reach some decision or get more counseling. God bless 1tash1 -- I'm with ya. Hugs, Lee