Anika, Bless you for your kind words. They almost made tears well up in my eyes, emotion, I haven't felt emotion in months, just numb.

The Ladyzero name, well not sure where I got it, but call me Ladywhatever I don't mind. Howzabout :
Ladygetthefeckoutofthatbed ?
Ladymiserysoup ?
Ladylazylayinginpitypitpis- sedoff ?

Yes, maybe I'll just have to ask him outright tomorrow. It is possible that even now we both want different things. His twin married his gf recently at 53, I kind of hoped that would stir something in him.

In my old days, I was quite a bubbly happy person. Fairly attractive and slim, Jeez, I've got clothes in size 6 & 8, I was wearing maybe 18 months ago.
Now I'd scare old ladies and small children, I need my hair colouring, it's dark and grey is showing. WTF ? Grey hair ? I was always highlighted blonde.

Well after tomorrow night hopefully I'll be nearer knowing the fate of the bizare relationship.

LORD HEAR MY PRAYERS ! !